Anime Talk: Rosario  Vampire Edition
by Dragonlover71491
Summary: Welcome to Anime Talk! Go inside to see what this is about, you won't regret it :
1. Introduction

This is my first Rosario + Vampire fanfic…or close to it anyway.

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters, otherwise I would've made Tsukune kiss Moka already!

Anime Talk: Rosario + Vampire Edition

Introduction:

A teenage girl with glasses, shoulder length black hair, pale skin, black dragon wings, claws, and a tail sits on an oak desk. Dressed in jeans and a white tee, I smile as I turn to the audience.

"Hello folks, my name is Dragonlover71491, but you can call me Draggy for short. I'm the host for Anime Talk, where you, the readers, send in questions for me to ask of the characters of a particular anime. This time I'm going solo as I meet and speak with several characters from one of the funniest ecchi animes we have out there, "Rosairo + Vampire," isn't that cool?"

The crowd cheers as I smile.

"As I've already stated, you send in questions for me to ask the characters during each of their interviews. But…" I grin mischievously, "you can also send in dares for them to do along with your questions, just for your personal entertainment."

I then search my desk for a moment before pulling out a sheet of paper.

"Here's the list of characters I'll be interviewing from Rosario + Vampire…"

Tsukune Aono

Moka Akashiya

Kurumu Kurono

Yukari Sendo

Mizore Shirayuki

Ginei Morioka AKA Gin

Ruby Tojo

"And I will be interviewing them in this order, no jumping around all over the place. I prefer to stay organized. All you need to do is write out your questions and dares on your review. Also, here's a list of characters I was thinking of interviewing, but wasn't sure if I should…" I grin as I pull out another sheet.

Inner Moka

Kokoa Shuzen, with Kou the bat

Shizuka Nekonome (the cat demon Homeroom teacher)

Ririko Kagome (the lamia math teacher)

Tsurara Shirayuki (Mizore's mother)

Ageha Kurono (Kurumu's mother)

"If you want me to interview any of these characters, all you need to do is say you want me to in a review you leave for this chapter. I'll need at least five people to say they want me to interview say…Kokoa, for example." I laugh as I fold up the papers.

I then pull out my laptop, which can bend reality to my will, and start typing.

"We'll first start with Tsukune. Write out your questions and dares for him in the review for this chapter. However, polls will only be open until December 3rd. After that, I'll start writing and post the interview shortly after that. Hope you're looking forward to this show as much as I am…you never know what's gonna happen :) Until then, I bid you all adieu."

* * *

><p>Dragonlover71491: You read it right, I'm interviewing some of the cast of Rosario + Vampire. Hope you write something in, I really want this story to be a success like the other editions I've made of this story. So happy Thanksgiving, and see you all soon.<p> 


	2. Tsukune Aono

Chapter 1: Tsukune Aono

"Welcome everyone to the start of Anime Talk! Now let's get the ball rolling by introducing our first guest, the only human attending Youkai Academy, Tsukune Aono! Show him some love people!" I grin as I point to my right.

Tsukune walks onto the stage nervously, eyeing my wings and tail fearfully as he sits down on the guest couch.

"Thank you so much for coming Tsukune…why are you staring at me?"

"Forgive me but…are you really half dragon?" He asks nervously as I spread out my wings and wag my tail.

"In the world of fanfics I am." I smirk before I cough out a fireball, tossing it casually in my hand.

Tsukune tilts his head in confusion.

"Nevermind. Anyway, as you know, today we'll be interviewing you. Plus some of our viewers have sent in questions they'd like you to answer Tsukune." I explain as I crush the fireball out.

"That doesn't sound so bad." He nods.

"And then later…we'll be making our dear Tsukune perform dares also sent in by some of our viewers, and he _has_ to do them, without complaints." I laugh mischievously.

"Wha? But I didn't agree to…!"

"Oh yes you did…it says right here in the contract you signed." I grin as I pull out our contract.

I then pull out a magnifying glass and place it near the bottom. Tsukune pales as he reads the passage, which states quite clearly:

Those who sign this contract are required to perform any and all dares sent in by our readers. If you refuse, Dragonlover71491/Draggy is permitted to either fry you or beat you to a bloody pulp, or whatever other method that pops into her head.

"As you can see Tsukune, you have no choice." I smirk as I roll up the contract before putting it back in my desk.

"I should have known there was something more to this show." Tsukune groans as I pull out an envelope.

"Quit complaining, you'll live…I think."

"Huh?"

"Let's just start up with our first few questions for Tsukune. These were sent in by Catyz101."

* * *

><p>Catyz101<p>

Questions:

1)Which Moka does he prefer?

2)What is it like having even guys throw themselves at him?

3)Has he gotten blood thirsty for Kurumu yet? And if so, what does he do when she pushes her breasts into his face and he's thirsty?

* * *

><p>"Good questions Catyz…so Tsukune, which Moka <em>do<em> you like more?" I smirk evilly as I wave tail.

"Can I skip this one? Please?"

"Nope. Now answer before I decide to turn you into barbeque."

"Uh…I guess…I like…um…"

"Sometime today Tsukune." I frown as I pull out a pocket watch.

"I like…outer Moka a bit more to be honest."

"Is it because Inner Moka would either drain you dry or beat you to death?"

"Uh…yeah."

"Of course. And what is it like having guys throwing themselves at you?"

"Unpleasant."

"I figured. And…okay this question is a little awkward." I sweatdrop.

"Uh…once or twice. But I'd never bite Kurumu-chan…there." Tsukune blushes.

"Really? Not even a nibble?" I add playfully as I flutter my wings.

Tsukune sputters as I pull out the next letter, cutting the envelope open with my claws.

"All right now, this next question is from HotelKatz. Boy, this is a random one. " I remark as I show Tsukune the letter.

* * *

><p>HotelKatz<p>

I do have a question. Wish I had more, but this is all I can think of.

Due to the similarities that Tsurara and Mizore have, would Tsukune be able to tell the difference if they decided to fool him by dressing in the same clothing as each other?

* * *

><p>"Your answer Tsukune?"<p>

"They don't look too much alike…I could probably tell them apart."

"Unless it was dark…how awkward would it be if you accidentally ended up in bed with Tsurara." I laugh as I pull out the next letter.

Tsukune glares at me as I continue without a care.

"Next we have…hold on." I mutter as I pull out a microphone, "Moka, Kurumu, Yukari, Mizore, Ruby would you all come on stage please?"

They all walk on stage calmly…until Kurumu decides to tackle poor Tsukune into her breasts.

"Tsukune!"

"Wah! Kurumu-chan!"

I groan as poor Tsukune flails around trying to escape Kurumu's bust.

"Settle down people, dares are later." I sigh as I use my tail to grab Kurumu around the waist.

I life her with ease and type on my laptop, producing a few extra chairs before settling her down in one. I then place Moka next to Tsukune and push her closer to him a bit before seating Mizore, Ruby, and Yukari.

"Right…now that we have you all here, these questions came to us from Batamut."

* * *

><p>Batamut<p>

Tsukune Aono: Have you ever thought about making your Harem official, after all over half of them won't put too much of a fight; I mean Moka has to share you with her other half, Ruby won't care as long as she is your slave, Yukari enthusiastically wants multiple partners, and Kurumu as a succubus feeds on sexual energy so more partners gives her more energy (even more than usual since they all care for each other).

The Rest: What do you think of this?

* * *

><p>"Tsukune, your answer?"<p>

"They're not my harem!" Tsukune exclaims as he points to each of the girls.

"I wouldn't mind Moka and Tsukune sharing me, but I refuse to share Tsukune with that milk cow desu!" Yukari screams as she points at Kurumu.

"Who are you calling a milk cow, pancake chest? But for once I agree, Tsukune is mine!" Kurumu growls as she stomps over and grabs poor Tsukune, shoving him in her cleavage again.

It pretty much turns into a brawl as all the girls grab a part of Tsukune and start tugging.

"Let him go you stalker!" Kurumu shouts at Mizore, who's holding Tsukune's waist.

"No."

"Tsukune's mine!" Moka growls as she pulls his left arm.

"But how's he supposed to order me around if he's yours?" Ruby argues as she pulls his right arm.

"I won't mind Moka, but I'm not letting any of you have Tsukune desu!" Yukari shouts as she pulls the boy's left leg.

"Just give it up, Tsukune's mine!" Kurumu snarls as she pulls on the right leg.

"Stop pulling you guys, I think I felt something crack!" Tsukune exclaims as I observe the chaos.

"Should I end this now or let it continue for a minute more?" I smile as I wag my tail, "nah, I better help him."

I instantly transform into a European/Japanese hybrid dragon, black from head to toe. My horns barely touch the ceiling as I snort out black smoke from my nostrils.

"Would you ladies kindly release Tsukune? I do believe you've caused him pain instead of the pleasure you were going for." I rumble as I point at Tsukune with my tail.

They all look at Tsukune a moment before letting him go, except for Mizore.

"Let go Mizore." I growl as I get on eye level with her.

"Why should I listen to you?"

I produce a tiny flame, letting it linger on my scaly lips.

"Point taken." She mutters before she lets go.

I morph back before I pull out the next letter.

"I may as well let you guys stay here for the rest of the interview. This question is from the beast of S.V. ."

* * *

><p>the Beast of S.V<p>

hey Tsukune. why is there so many fanfic version of you.

* * *

><p>"Ever wonder about that Tsukune?" I ask as I roll up the letter and set it on fire with my breath.<p>

"I guess people have their own idea of how they'd like me to be." Tsukune answers.

"Shame on them, Tsukune is perfect just the way he is." Moka frowns before wrapping her arms around Tsukune's neck.

I smile as I see Tsukune shyly wrap an arm around Moka's waist. But…Moka is Moka.

*Capu-chu!

"Ah! Moka-san!" Tsukune exclaims as Moka sucks his blood.

"Hey, hey, hey! No blood-sucking on stage Moka, there are some impressionable minds in the audience." I scold lightly as I use my tail to separate them.

"Oh, sorry! But Tsukune just smells so good."

"Whatever, just don't do it again." I sigh as I grab the next letter.

I shake my head as I notice the others glaring at Moka, but I just ignore it.

"This question was sent in by ShadowSentinel."

* * *

><p>ShadowSentinel<p>

Question to Tsukune: When you stop being spineless idiot and tell those idiots that you love Moka?

* * *

><p>"That's been bothering me for awhile too. Tsukune?"<p>

"Who're they calling an idiot!" Kurumu demands as she stabs the letter with her nails.

"I believe they mean you Kurumu…along with Mizore, Ruby, and Yukari. No offense." I clarify as I file my claws.

"It's a lie. Tsukune loves me. Right?" Mizore says dully as she turns to him.

All eyes are on Tsukune as I pull out a tape recorder.

"Uh…listen you guys…the truth is…I…lo…lov…I love…"

"Tsukune…" I growl as I pull out a syringe, "Don't make me use this."

"What's in there?" He asks nervously as I lose my patience.

"Truth serum." I grin as I stick him in the arm.

Tsukune rubs his arm a moment before his eyes glaze over.

"Now Tsukune, could you tell us who you really love?" I smile.

"The truth is I love Moka, but I can't say it because I'm afraid of hurting the others' feelings." Tsukune says monotonously before the serum wears off.

Moka looks happy and kisses Tsukune lovingly on the cheek. The others look like they're about to cry, while Kurumu…well…

"NO WAY AM I ACCEPTING THIS! PREPARE TO DIE MOKA!"

Just as Kurumu's wings pop out, she's set on fire…yes I did it with my fire breath :)

"Aie! Put me out!"

"Whatever you say Kurumu." I smirk as I pull out a fire hose.

I put it on full blast, soaking Kurumu to the bone.

"Now…are we going to behave ourselves?"

Kurumu growls at me, but I just move on.

"This question is from Pacific2472."

* * *

><p>Pacific2472<p>

To Tsukune: have you ever thought of taking precautionary measures in case Kurumu tries to rape you?

* * *

><p>"Uh…Tsukune, your answer to this unique question?" I laugh nervously as I see the look in Kurumu's eye.<p>

"I don't think Kurumu-chan would really try to rape me."

"Oh no?" I mutter as I point to the succubus.

Kurumu licks her lips as she stares at Tsukune.

"You see my point?"

"Uh…yeah." He states nervously.

"Hold on…" I mutter as I rummage around in my desk.

I then toss him a spray bottle.

"How does this help?" Tsukune asks as I stretch out my wings.

"Simple, it's filled with holy water." I state clearly.

"Will it really work?"

"She's an evil species of demon, of course it should work." I smirk as I take the spray bottle.

I give Kurumu a quick spritz, smiling as she yelps in pain.

"See? Totally works." I smirk as I toss the bottle back to Tsukune.

I then pull out the next envelope, Kurumu still glaring at me.

"This question is from DarknessNeoAngel."

* * *

><p>DarknessNeoAngel<p>

Now my question to Tsukune. Do you plan to drag out who you will choose till after graduation or before then?

* * *

><p>"I guess this question's already been answered, though some people…" I glare at Kurumu, "Are unwilling to accept Tsukune's choice."<p>

Tsukune nods quickly as I pull out the next letter.

"This question is from CrazyCannibal."

* * *

><p>CrazyCannibal<p>

This is gonna be good.

Will you finally stop being so weak now that youve been given an upgrade plus training by touhou fuhai?

Can you please get that ghoul form under control seriously its your body.

* * *

><p>"Good question." I mutter before I crumple the paper with my tail.<p>

"I admit I've gotten better, but I still need some work before I can take down any real enemies. And I'm getting a little better at controlling my ghoul form."

"Great news Tsukune, though for my own safety I won't test that control." I smile as I grab the next letter.

Tsukune just shrugs as Moka cuddles closer.

"This next one is from kyubi600."

* * *

><p>kyubi600<p>

hello I am kyuubi600 I am a demon fox I wondered if this human will choose once and for all one of the girls for be his lover because you have a choice in life is despairing to see her but I understand he is afraid not to hurt one of them

* * *

><p>"Already been done. Tsukune picks the lovely pink haired vampire out of the group." I grin happily.<p>

"Don't understand why he'd pick her over me." Kurumu grumbles.

"Probably because he can survive a bit of blood loss from Moka's bites, not oxygen depravation when you shove him in your sweater puppies." I state as I grab the next letter.

The others nod as Kurumu glares at me.

"I'm just saying the truth. These next questions are from MMB35."

* * *

><p>MMB35<p>

Greetings, Aono Tsukune, I am the one, the only, MakeMeBad35. I'm sure you have heard of me, I can be quite famous in the States of America.

Now that the formalities are over, let's get to business.

You are half ghoul, half human. How are you going to explain that to your parents and Kyoko? Who are you going to choose from your friends?

Let me give you the basics. After this, my friend, you are going to know who to choose, I will also hint who you should choose when I am done.

Akashiya Moka (both versions): A blood firsty vampire, one kind but the other cruel. Survival is slim and death could happen due to blood loss.

Kurono Kurumu: A succubus with a large bust, double D-cups at least. A being of sexual desire and has chosen you as her "Destined One" or "Mate of Fate". You also had your first kiss with her.

Sendo Yukari: A 11/12 year old witch. Has the dream of a threesome with you and Akashiya-san.

Shirayuki Mizore: A yuki-onna. One who wants to freeze you and have sex with to save her people.

Tojo Ruby: An older witch, 18 or 19 years old at least. A masochist and wishes to be your slave, and will do anything you desire from her.

I've made it easy for you to try and understand. The girls I would suggest for you to choose is either Kurono Kurumu, or Tojo Ruby.

* * *

><p>"One question's already been answered. So how <em>are<em> you going to explain that you're not human anymore to your family, Tsukune?"

"I'll tell them…eventually."

"So you're going to drag it out like you did with the girls?"

Tsukune gulps as I smile victoriously.

"No?" He replies before I turn to the others.

"He can be really stupid, can't he?" I sigh as I move my bangs out of my eyes.

"Say what you stupid reptile?" Kurumu snarls as I just ignore her.

"And now our final question, which was sent in by PhiX3." I smile as I ignore Kurumu again.

* * *

><p>PhiX3<p>

Tsukune: Do you feel you are going to die young at this rate?

* * *

><p>"Well Tsukune?"<p>

"I don't think I'd go that far."

"Well let's see…between Moka sucking your blood," I say as I point at the vampire, "Kurumu suffocating you in her cleavage," I point to Kurumu, "and Mizore giving you frostbite, I doubt you would have lived long." I finish before I stare him down.

Tsukune says nothing as Moka hugs him.

"Well, we're officially done with the questions. Now it's time for Tsukune to perform a few dares." I grin evilly as I pull out the first letter, "And we'll start things off with Catyz101.

I giggle a bit before I shove the paper in Tsukune's face. He blushes as he reads it.

* * *

><p>Catyz101<p>

Dares:

1)Confess to Moka

2)Hug Kurumu the way she hugs him

3)Tell the girls he's asexual

I know lame, but I thought it was funny

* * *

><p>"The first's been done. Kurumu is going to love this." I snicker.<p>

"But…I…" Tsukune stammers as I roll up the paper.

"You have to do it Tsukune. Girls, please refrain from killing the succubus."

The others look at me weird as I turn my eyes to Tsukune.

"Oh…this is so wrong." Tsukune whines as he walks over to Kurumu.

Kurumu looks up at Tsukune before he grabs her shoulders and shoves her into his chest.

"Tsukune!" Kurumu exclaims, but she doesn't struggle as much as he does when she does it.

"I'm sorry, but I have to do this." He explains as I laugh at his discomfort.

"And just to make things a little more interesting." I smile evilly as I use the tip of my tail to type on my computer.

Tsukune is now shirtless, and Kurumu is happy with that fact.

"Kya! Tsukune's hugging me into his chest without a shirt on, my life is complete!" She squeals as she nuzzles into Tsukune.

"Ah! Kurumu!"

I laugh as Kurumu refuses to let go, Tsukune trying desperately to try and pry her off.

"Tsukune…didn't you have something to say?"

"Uh…I'm asexual, sorry girls." Tsukune fibs as Kurumu falls to the ground in tears.

"No it can't be true!" She wails.

The others have similar reactions before I smile.

"Relax girls, it was just a dare." I grin as I toss the letter to Kurumu.

"That was just mean." She pouts before I pull out the next letter.

"Whatever…this next dare is from HotelKatz."

* * *

><p>HotelKatz<p>

I dare Tsukune to try the age growing drops Yukari made. Let's see what the girls's reaction would be to a Chibi-Tsukune!

* * *

><p>"Oh this going to be good, hey Yukari! Got any of those age growing drops?"<p>

"Yes! But why do you want them desu?"

"Simple…down the hatch Tsukune!" I grin as I make him swallow a drop.

He gags a moment before he tranforms into…!

"KAWAII!" The girls squeal as Tsukune stands in front of them as a chibi five-year-old.

"Oh no…" Tsukune whimpers as Kurumu picks him up.

"So adorable! Oh let Mama Kurumu give you a big kiss Tsukune!" She smiles before she puckers up.

But he's snatched away from her, and finds himself in Mizore's arms.

"My chibi Tsukune." Mizore smiles as she presses a light kiss to his forehead.

Tsukune shivers as he's held by the yuki-onna, sneezing cutely once in a while.

"Hey, share him would ya desu!" Yukari shouts as she pries the child from Mizore.

Yukari then squeezes Tsukune tight, his eyes nearly bulging out of his head.

"You're so cute Tsukune desu!" Yukari smiles as she kisses his cheek.

Ruby plucks him from the younger witch, settling him on her hip like a mother.

"How cute, does my wittle Tsukune want a cookie?" She coos to him as she rubs noses with the tiny Tsukune.

Moka grabs him and cuddles him close, stroking his hair lovingly.

"Tsukune's so cute like this. And he smells sweet too." She smiles as she sniffs his hair.

I grab him before Moka decides to take a bite.

"Okay, enough with this nonsense." I smile as I type on my laptop.

Tsukune poofs back to normal.

"Now let's move on. This dare comes to us from ShadowSentinel."

* * *

><p>ShadowSentinel<p>

Dare: To show Inner Moka her place.

* * *

><p>"Oh lord, I better get his funeral rights prepared." I sweatdrop.<p>

"Huh? What do you mean?" Tsukune asks.

I shove the letter in his face. He pales as he turns to Moka.

"Do I really need to?"

"Unfortunately yes. Good luck Tsukune." I wince, feeling sorry for the human.

"Okay…" He sighs as he looks at Moka.

"What's the matter Tsukune?"

"Moka…please don't hate me for this."

Tsukune then grabs the rosary and pulls it off. Moka goes through her transformation, and in her place she's replaced by…Inner Moka.

"**There had better be a good reason for being released when there's no danger, Tsukune."**

"Well Moka-sama, the thing is, you were released so you could help Tsukune with a dare for our talk show." I smile nervously; even though I'm half dragon, I know better than to pick a fight with a vampire who can kick an orc (Saizou) through a mountain.

"**Really? So there's no monster that needs to be shown their place?"**

"Yes…but please…can you do this for us?" I squeak as I hide behind my desk.

"**Very well…just what is this dare?"**

I use my tail to pass Inner Moka the letter, the appendage quivering as it's pulled back.

"**You ****must ****be ****joking****…"** Inner Moka grins as she turns to Tsukune.

"I'm n-not…if you would be so kind as to do this for us?" I whisper, peeking at the vampire over the top of my desk.

"**I ****suppose ****I ****can ****allow ****this ****human ****to ****try ****and ****show ****me ****my ****place.****"** Inner Moka laughs as she stands up.

Tsukune follows behind her, shaking horribly as I look to the others.

"Whatever happens to him, don't blame me." I say as I curl in my wings.

The others nod as they watch the vampire and human, knowing all too well the extent of Inner Moka's strength.

"**Well Tsukune? Are you ready?"**

Tsukune takes a deep breath and squares his shoulders.

"Know your place!" He shouts as he makes a kick at Inner Moka's head.

But she catches his ankle, smirking as she holds him upside down.

"**You call that a kick? THIS is a kick Tsukune, know your place!"**

We wince as Tsukune goes through the ceiling of the studio, leaving a hole.

"Ouch…he'll feel that into next week." I whisper before I fly up and out of the hole.

I peer up into the sky, seeing a black speck flailing in the air.

"Oh great, now I have to catch him." I sigh tiredly before transforming.

Tsukune is panicking as he starts his descent, but he grunts as he lands on my head.

"You okay Tsukune?" I inquire as I start back for the studio.

"Uh…yeah, I'm fine." He says as I land on the roof of the studio, sticking my head in to let him off.

The others stare at me a moment, Inner Moka coming closer to examine me.

"**You look like you could put up a fair fight, what do you say to a battle with me?"**

"No thanks…" I rumble before I morph back, "I'd like to live thanks."

I then toss Tsukune the rosary, wanting the vampire to be sealed again.

"Let's move on before Inner Moka wrecks the place."

Tsukune nods in agreement before replacing the rosary. Moka goes back to her sweet self, taking a quick bite from Tsukune's neck.

*Capu-chu!

"Ah! Moka!"

"Again with the blood-sucking…our next dare is from Pacific2472." I sigh as I slit open the letter.

I then fall on the floor laughing, my tail thrashing around.

"Huh? What's so funny about this dare?" Tsukune inquires before I toss him the letter.

He sputters as I rummage around in my desk.

* * *

><p>Pacific2472<br>Dares: I dare you to... try to outrun Kurumu on a hoverboard.

* * *

><p>"Aha! Found it!" I shout triumphantly, holding up a black cube.<p>

The others look at me strangely as I toss it a few feet away. I then drum my fingers as I wait for it to work. The others gasp as the cube materializes a fairly well-equipped laboratory, including a supercomputer.

"My Lab–On–The–Go, I only use this in special circumstances." I grin as I go over to my supercomputer.

I turn it on, and a female computerized voice answers me.

"Hello Dragonlover, how may I be of assistance today?"

"Computer, I want you to give me the Dragoncraft Mark 1."

"As you wish."

A random drawer opens, and I quickly pull out the hoverboard of my own design. Lightweight with a dragon-like head, it's a deep shade of red with black eyes.

"Tsukune, meet the Dragoncraft Mark 1. This little baby will work just fine for this dare."

"Uh…" He stammers as I pull out a matching helmet.

"Just wear this, it's connected to the hovercraft, so whatever direction you want to go, just think it and the machine will do the rest." I explain.

"O…kay."

I strap his feet in before turning to Kurumu.

"Now you have to chase him on this thing." I grin.

"Yahoo-hoo! I'm loving this already." Kurumu cheers as her wings pop out.

Tsukune glances at us nervously as Kurumu starts to fly.

"Go!"

Tsukune speeds off, Kurumu right on his tail.

"Whoa! That thing goes fast desu!" Yukari compliments as the pair fly high above our heads.

"Thanks…its top speed has clocked out at 150 mph." I smile proudly as I continue to watch Kurumu try and catch Tsukune, without much luck.

"Slow down Tsukune!" Kurumu whines.

"I don't know how!" He screams as he pulls off the helmet.

"Don't do that! If you take off the helmet, it automatically shuts down!" I scream.

"Wha?"

Tsukune starts to fall, but Kurumu catches him.

"Got you Tsukune! Yahoo-hoo!"

"That's only because you didn't want him to become a Tsukune pancake. And you get to suffocate him, again." I growl.

Kurumu just sticks her tongue out at me as she set Tsukune back on the ground.

"Moving on…the next few dares are from DarknessNeoAngel."

* * *

><p>DarknessNeoAngel<p>

This is going to be fun.

1st, I dare Tsukune to stay in a room with both Kurumu's and Mizore's mothers

2nd, have Tsukune eat Yukari's curry

* * *

><p>"Oh great…I have to call in the MILF's." I sigh as I pull out my cellphone.<p>

Everyone watches as I dial swiftly before putting the phone up to my ear.

"Hello, Ageha Kuruno? Look I know you're busy, but I have a favor to ask…no it doesn't involve you setting me up. I'm hosting a talk show right now and I need you here for a dare. It involves Tsukune and…Hello?"

I turn to the group and shrug.

"She hung up on me."

Tsukune breathes a sigh of relief, thinking Ageha lost interest. But…

"Now what's this dare Tsukune needs to perform that includes moi? Does he need to learn how to pleasure a woman?" Ageha croons as she places the back of Tsukune's head in her bosom.

"No…and I need to call Tsurara." I sigh as I dial up Mizore's mother.

After pressing a few buttons, I press my phone to my ear again.

"Tsurara Shirayuki? You may not know me, but I need you here for my show. Tsukune needs to perform a dare, and I need you…"

I sigh as I look to the others again.

"She hung up on me too."

Tsurara comes up behind me, causing a chill to run up my spine.

"So why am I here? Has Tsukune decided to marry Mizore-chan?" She asks around her lollipop.

"No, if you two lovely ladies will follow me. You too, Tsukune." I frown as I grab him with my tail.

"Can't we talk this over?" Tsukune whimpers as he struggles against my coils.

I lead them over to a spare room and open the door.

"Ladies first." I smile politely.

Ageha and Tsurara step inside, both of them looking at me unsurely. I then turn around and release Tsukune, kicking him inside before slamming the door shut.

"Let me out!" He screams from inside as I lock the door.

"Sorry Tsukune, I have to leave you in there for a bit." I sigh sympathetically.

"Did you have to lock him in there with my mother?" Kurumu demands as I pull out a chocolate bar and nibble on it.

"It's a dare, we're just going to leave him in there for a few minutes."

A bit later…I open the door, only to have Tsukune cling to me.

"Never do that…to me again." He shudders as I get a closer look at him.

His clothes are disheveled, and he has frost and claw marks on his sleeves.

"Poor guy…even he didn't deserve that." I grin as I pat him comfortingly.

The two MILF's poke their heads out, staring at Tsukune.

"You two can go home now, you've done your part."

They contemplate staying, but I hold up a fireball and a holy bible.

"Leave. Now."

"Fine. See you another time Tsukune." Ageha winks before sauntering off.

"Good-bye Tsukune, see you again." Tsurara smiles before shuffling off.

I sigh heavily as I look to the girls.

"Let's hope that never happens again."

They all nod in agreement. I then sit back at my desk, re-checking the letter.

"Yukari, do you have any of your curry with you?"

"Yes I do desu!" She grins as she passes me a plastic container.

I open it slowly, grimacing at the contents. The curry is green, with a few eyeballs, frogs' legs, and lizard tails floating in it.

"Heaven have mercy on his stomach when he swallows this." I gag as I grab a spoon and pass both items to Tsukune.

Tsukune turns a bit green when he sees the curry, asking me with his eyes "does he really need to eat it?"

"Sorry Tsukune, just one bite at least." I sigh as I spoon it over some rice.

Tsukune smiles crookedly at Yukari as he spoons a bit of her curry. She smiles widely as he slowly puts it in his mouth. He chews it for a minute before swallowing. I pull out a bucket when I see his eyes water.

"Over here Tsukune."

He dashes over and pukes his guts out, heaving sickly as Yukari starts to cry.

"It was supposed to be good for him desu!"

"Making it good for him and making it taste good are not the same thing Yukari." I frown as Tsukune finishes throwing up.

"Oh god…I think I puked up my intestines." Tsukune moans.

"Here…drink this." I smile gently at him as I pass him a black bottle.

"What is this?"

"It's Stomach-Cola, a special soda that calms and soothes the stomach's problems instantaneously. My own personal creation."

Tsukune looks at me weirdly before taking a sip. He then smiles as his stomach feels better.

"Hey it worked."

"All of my inventions work Tsukune. Now our next few dares are from CrazyCannibal."

I blush a moment before I quickly gather up Kurumu, Mizore, Yukari, and Ruby.

"You guys don't need to be here for the next few dares." I say quickly as I turn into my dragon form and fly off with them in my hands.

Tsukune and Moka stare after me as I fly through the ceiling, making a bigger hole.

"I'll fix that later!"

After I come back and fix the hole, I toss the letter to the lovebirds. Tsukune gets a nosebleed as he reads what he has to do.

* * *

><p>CrazyCannibal<p>

Confess to Moka(both).

Release inner Moka and do her.

* * *

><p>"Remove the rosary Tsukune, you need to confess to Inner Moka." I say before I dive under my desk in fear.<p>

"Oh please let me live through this." He whimpers as he grabs the rosary and pulls it off.

One transformation later…

"**There'd better be a good reason why I'm out here again."**

"Tsukune…you have something to say." I squeak.

"Uh…Moka…I love…I love…"

"**Yes Tsukune?"**

"I love…you."

Inner Moka says nothing before leaning in and placing a lingering kiss on his cheek.

"**You've earned at least that."**

I sigh with relief before I grab them both with my tail and toss them in the spare room.

"Good luck Tsukune, you'll need it!" I shout before I put on multiple locks and sealing spells on the door, running away.

"But Draggy-san!" Tsukune screams from within.

"**What's the meaning of this Tsukune?"**

"Well, uh…"

There's muffled whispering before Inner Moka speaks.

"**I see…you had better make it worth my time Tsukune."**

A few hours later…

"I hope Tsukune is still alive." I shudder as I open the door.

Tsukune stumbles out, his pants low on his hips.

"How did it go Tsukune?"

Inner Moka saunters out, smiling like a satisfied cat who ate a bowl of cream.

"**Tsukune ****may ****be ****human, ****but ****he ****has ****his****…****finer ****points.****"** She grins naughtily.

I blush and laugh nervously before I go to the mailbag, tossing the rosary back to them again.

"We only have a few more dares left. This next one from MMB35."

I fall over twitching a moment before I crumple the paper.

"This guy is definitely not coming on this show, that's for sure."

Tsukune picks up the paper and looks it over, blushing a bit.

* * *

><p>MMB35<p>

My dare is not a mean one. I dare you to kiss Kurono Kurumu on the lips. She risked her life to save you when Touhou Fuhai couldn't. And I know you can't be embarresed to do so for she kiss you first. All you have to do is return it.

Ever heard of the anime Bleach? Fail that dare or if you don't do it, then all you have to do is punch Kurosaki Ichigo as hard as you can, open the Jigoku no Mon and throw Kurosaki into the depths of Jigoku.

Fail to do that, I will write stories of you being tortured by the Jigoku guards, the Kushanada, eaten and revived to relive it again.

Very simple dare. Choose one or I choose the other.

* * *

><p>"Oh boy…Kurumu, we need you out here pronto!" I shout into my mike.<p>

She flies in and lands on my back, squishing me into the floor.

"You called?" She croons as she digs her feet into my lower back.

"Yes…now get off before I turn you into roasted succubus." I snarl as I black smoke comes out of my nostrils.

She scitters off as I dust myself off.

"Okay…Tsukune, you know what to do." I sigh as I cover Moka's eyes.

"What's going on?" Kurumu asks as I toss her the letter.

She smiles broadly before tackling Tsukune to the floor.

"Pucker up Tsukune!"

She presses her lips against Tsukune's, hardly giving the boy room to breathe. Tsukune quickly returns the kiss, wanting it to end. But then Kurumu tries to slip him some tongue.

"Hey, hey, hey!" I shout, knocking Kurmu off with my tail, "None of that you harlot!" I snarl angrily.

"You are you calling a…!"

My pupils turn into slits as I hiss like a snake, revealing sharpened teeth.

"Don't test me Kurumu."

"Eh-heh…Yahoo-hoo."

"Okay…now we need to move onto the next dare." I grin as I go back to the mailbag.

After I open it, I make this face: O.O

"Holy Santa Maria, this guys is nuts."

"What is it Draggy-san?" Moka inquires.

"Well…this dare was sent to us by rifleman123…he wants us to…well." I say awkwardly before I pass Moka the letter.

* * *

><p>rifleman123<p>

I dare the whole harem along with Tsukune, Gin, kokoa and Kou, also inner Moka to go banzia sky diving (basically throwing the parachute out of the plane waiting 7 sec. And then jumping for the parachute.) Dun dun DUUUUNNNN! Nice idea for the talk show btw Draggy:)

* * *

><p>"Are you serious!" Tsukune shouts as he imagines the result of jumping after a parachute.<p>

"Unfortunately…we have to do this," I sigh as I pull out my mike again, "Mizore, Yukari, Ruby, Gin, Kokoa, Kou-chan, we need you out here."

All of them walk on stage, Gin flashing his camera.

"So, who's up for a photo?" He smiles lecherously as he stares at the audience.

"None of that you horndog." I growl as I confiscate his camera.

"Hey! I need that!" He argues as he reaches for the camera.

"No! I'm not giving you the chance to take panty shots you perverted dog!" I snarl.

Kokoa has Kou-chan turn into a mallet and tries to hit Moka, but I set her on fire with my breath.

"None of that you pipsqueak."

"Why you!" She roars as she tries to attack me.

I just grab her with my tail and repeatedly bash her into the stage.

"Ah! Draggy-san!" Moka squeals as I release her sister.

"Relax Moka, I held back…somewhat." I grin as Kokoa twitches on the ground.

"Are you okay Kokoa chu?" Kou-chan inquires as he flutters above her body.

"She'll be fine…now to separate the Mokas." I grin as I pull out Lillith's mirror.

"Where did you get that?" Tsukune questions as I polish the mirror.

"I borrowed it."

I show the mirror to Moka, splitting her in two.

"Now that we have everything we need, follow me to my private jet."

"You have a private jet?" Kurumu asks as I lead them away.

"Of course, but I use it only the most special of circumstances."

Soon enough, we're in the air and flying a several hundred feet above the earth, safe aboard the Dracus Flier Special.

"Okay, this is real simple, I throw your parachute out the door, we wait seven seconds, then you guys jump after it." I explain as I gather up the parachutes.

Tsukune raises his hand.

"Yes Tsukune?"

"Is there anyway I can talk you out of this?"

"Sorry, we can't back out of this."

"I can just fly." Kurumu grins smugly.

"Not this time, I cut a few slits in your wings when you weren't looking." I smile as I hold up a pair of scissors.

"Huh?" Kurumu gasps as she tries to fly, seeing the slits I made.

"Now it's fair, plus I did the same for Kou-chan."

"You said it." He grumbles miserably from the floor.

I pick him up and cuddle him against my cheek.

"I really hated to do it, but…I wanted it to be fair, forgive me Kou-chan." I coo before I press a kiss to his little head.

He smiles before I turn to them all.

"Are we clear about the…"

"Ah! You pervert!" Kurumu growls as she kicks Gin.

"What did he do?" I sigh irritatedly.

"He grabbed my butt." Kurumu growls.

"I'm not going to deal with this." I growl as I grab Gin by the scruff of his neck.

I pull the door open and glare at him.

"Good luck without a parachute." I snarl before I toss him out.

After a moment…I toss a parachute out after him.

"May as well give him a chance."

I then turn to the others, a small smile on my face.

"Okay, so who's going first?"

Inner Moka swaggers forward, holding out her hand expectantly.

"So Inner Moka's going first, no surprise there." I grin as I pass her a paracute.

She then tosses it out the door, waits seven seconds, then jumps after it.

"Okay, next?"

Kokoa tosses out a parachute then jumps out.

"Of course she goes after her sister."

Kou-chan comes next, so I pass him a Kou-chan sized parachute.

"Good luck little guy." I smile as I pat him on the head.

He nods before doing the same as the others.

"All right, next?"

Yukari comes forward, looking out the door fearfully.

"You'll be fine, nothing bad is going to happen."

Yukari doesn't believe me, but she goes out.

"Next!"

Mizore is calm as she goes next, looking at Tsukune a moment before jumping out.

"Move it forward people, we don't have all day."

Kurumu clings to me, shaking fearfully.

"I don't want to die! Please don't make me do it!" She pleads tearfully.

"Sorry succubus, but you have to." I sigh as I toss out her parachute.

I then grab her with my tail and toss her out.

"She'll be fine…I think."

Ruby goes out without another word.

"I guess she's used to being in the sky."

I then look to Moka and Tsukune.

"Just to be nice, I'll let you both go at the same time." I smile as I toss the last two parachutes out the door.

Moka and Tsukune hold hands before jumping out.

"And now to follow after them." I grin.

I quickly set the jet to autopilot, giving it directions to return home. I then open my wings wide and jump out the door, diving after the cast.

"BANZAI!"

I fly with ease, catching sight of Tsukune and Moka, the latter clinging to Tsukune.

"Wah! I don't want to die!" She cries as I fly around them.

"Oh relax, I won't let you guys die. I'd be sued!" I grin as I knock their parachutes closer to them with my tail.

"Thanks Draggy-san." Tsukune smiles as he grabs hold of them.

"No problem!"

I then fly further down, catching sight of the others. And I laugh as I see Kurumu struggle to put hers on.

"Need some help Bazooka Chest?" I grin as I circle her.

"I'm fine, just go away you damn fly." She growls at me.

"Jeez, I was just trying to help." I laugh before I fly off.

I then frown as I see Kou-chan trying to get his on.

"Hold still little guy." I smile as I slip it on for him.

"Thanks a lot chu!" He squeaks at me before I fly toward the earth.

"I'll just wait until they touch ground to see how they did."

After a while…

"Poor Kurumu, I guess I should have taught you guys how to drive." I laugh as I see the succubus hanging upside down from the branches of a tree.

"Oh shut up and get me down!"

"You can do that yourself, I have to check on the others." I cackle before I skitter off.

I find Yukari and Ruby in an eagle's nest, Mizore in a lake, Kokoa and Kou-chan in a mud puddle, Inner Moka on top of a boulder, and Tsukune and Moka dangling from a tree.

"Now the only one left to find is Gin." I state as I look over who we have.

"Uh…I think I found him." Tsukune sweatdrops as he points to a hole in the ground.

I wince as I see that the hold is Gin-shaped, and about fifty feet deep.

"Ouch…I wonder if he survived." I say as I look into it.

I then crawl inside, tail disappearing out of sight. After a few moments, I pull myself out, Gin's unconscious body wrapped in my tail's coils.

"He's going to need a medic." I shrug as I dust myself off.

I then take us back to the studio, laying the werewolf down on the couch.

"How are we going to wake him up desu?" Yukari ponders as I wave smelling salts under his nose.

"Since this isn't working, there's only one thing that'll work for him."

I then make them step back a few feet before tapping Gin on the head.

"Hey Gin, wake up, Moka and the others are in the changing room right now."

"Awooo! Really?" He asks stupidly as I shake my head.

"Once a pervert, always a pervert." I groan as I smack him upside the head.

"Ow! I'm injured here, remember?" He growls at me as I ignore him.

"I could really care less." I sigh as I grab the last letter.

I choke on a laugh as I pass it to Tsukune.

"It's amazing what these people come up with. PhiX3 is no exception apparently." I chuckle.

* * *

><p>PhiX3<p>

Dare: Tell Gin you think he's the sexiest one in the show in front of your harem.

* * *

><p>"Go right ahead Tsukune." I snicker as I push him forward.<p>

"Uh…do I really have to?"

"Yes, now do it!"

"Okay…uh Gin-sempai?"

The werewolf looks up at Tsukune strangely, wincing as he's still in a lot of pain.

"Gin-sempai…I think…you're…uh…" He stammers as he looks at me.

I glare at Tsukune, holding a fireball threateningly.

"I think….you're the sexiest on our show." Tsukune says at last.

Gin falls off the couch, twitching as I laugh at him.

"Dude, I don't swing that way!" Gin exclaims as I fall on my butt and laugh.

The girls faint in disbelief, excluding Inner Moka, Kou-chan, and Kokoa.

"Guys relax, it was just a dare." I say between guffaws before I regain my breath.

They all wake up and smile in relief as I stretch out my wings.

"Well that was fun. Thanks for coming on you guys." I smile as they all start to leave.

"But what about the Mokas?" Tsukune reminds me.

"Oh right…thanks Tsukune."

I show the mirror to the two Mokas, fusing them together again.

"Now that's better. See you guys around!" I grin as they leave.

As soon as they're all gone, I turn to the camera.

"Well…that was a "fun" start to our show, but we have more to come. My next guest will be our favorite vampire, Moka. Polls will be open until the 22nd of December, so don't be late."

I then turn into my dragon form and fly off.

"UNTIL THEN, SEE YA FOLKS!"

* * *

><p>Dragonlover71491: Sorry this took so long to do, but this is twenty pages long with size 9 font! Plus between work, being sick, and having writer's block during the writing process, of course it took me a while. Either way, hope you all enjoyed it. Plus, Rosario + Vampire seasons one and two come out on DVD on the 20th of December! Ciao!<p> 


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